Be A Better Declutter With These 3 Phrases
It turns out that, when faced with the prospect of editing the contents of their lives, the emotional reactions people experience are not unique on the whole.
One of my main tasks with clients is helping them to understand these reactions and contextualize them. With me, they figure out what emotions are underlying their decisions and, most importantly, whether or not those beliefs are constructive.
I help them to make the necessary (Simple) mental shifts when deconstructive beliefs are revealed. These shifts are the difference between editing being painful or freeing, between it being guilt-inducing or illuminating, between it being a self-centered, over critical experience, or a considerate, compassionate one.
And since I know how widespread these beliefs are, and since I can’t be there to coach you personally (yet) through the moment of decluttering, here are 3 common reactions and 3 powerful ways to shift your mindset and your experience:
1.
Instead of looking at that mint-condition item, the tags to which may or may not still be attached, that you never wore/used or haven’t felt pulled towards in years and saying…
“I’m a wasteful person.”
Say instead:
“I’m a generous person.”
And you can back that up with:
“Rather than letting this sit here another decade in order to pacify my guilt, I’m actively choosing to give this to someone else who will truly need and enjoy it. And since I can’t do anything to change the original decision that brought this item into my life, I’m now focusing on how I can use it to create positivity, regardless of the nature of its origins.”
2.
Instead of staring mournfully at your pile of things to be donated/discarded and thinking:
“I’m losing so much.”
Think instead:
“I’m gaining so much.”
And you can back that up with:
“By doing this, I’m gaining massive clarity for myself about what my priorities are now, what material possessions I need in order to be my best self, and which I no longer need because they don’t serve me anymore, they weigh me down, they distract me from my goals.
I’m gaining free space, and with it all the possibility of what new good things may come into my life.”
And on and on, as they’re true for you.
3.
Instead of getting lost in the anxiety-ridden maze of doubt and fear and thinking,
“But what if I need this someday?”
Think instead:
“What do I need now?
And you can back that up with:
“I know that I can’t predict the future, and I also don’t want to carry around every item imaginable for the next thirty years on the off chance I end up needing it. It may be that I do need something I parted with thirty years ago, but carrying that heavy a load isn’t worth it. I put my trust in the universe that I will be able to get what I need when I need it from this moment onward.”
Image credit: Anthropologie5 Comments
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5 Comments
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the first thing I thought when I saw the picture was “no, don’t let go of that mirrored ball. it’s fabulous!” she’s got some pretty sweet clutter. it’s better than mine. 😉
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Ha, well let’s say she’s in the sorting phase–the giant disco ball will stay…other things will go…
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YES!!! Love the truth of these statements and the freedom you can receive from giving, gaining, and trusting. Thank you for this fantastic post!
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Yes, yes, yes to all three.
This article will be my New Year’s resolution.
Printing it off and putting on the fridge!!! -
Each of these thoughts are based on some powerful negative emotions; #1 is shame, #2 is regret, and 3 is fear. I think change is difficult for many people because they think in terms of what they’re going to lose, rather than what they’re going to gain. Thank you for such a succinct article, and for the supportive dose of encouragement!
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the first thing I thought when I saw the picture was “no, don’t let go of that mirrored ball. it’s fabulous!” she’s got some pretty sweet clutter. it’s better than mine. 😉
Ha, well let’s say she’s in the sorting phase–the giant disco ball will stay…other things will go…
YES!!! Love the truth of these statements and the freedom you can receive from giving, gaining, and trusting. Thank you for this fantastic post!
Yes, yes, yes to all three.
This article will be my New Year’s resolution.
Printing it off and putting on the fridge!!!
Each of these thoughts are based on some powerful negative emotions; #1 is shame, #2 is regret, and 3 is fear. I think change is difficult for many people because they think in terms of what they’re going to lose, rather than what they’re going to gain. Thank you for such a succinct article, and for the supportive dose of encouragement!